A me update

Whilst I have nothing of particular interest to talk about, I wanted to pen down (? type down) my thoughts on the last month or so. My friend and I talk every day. Not by calling each other but by recording voice notes and listening/ replying when we have a few free minutes in the day. I find that by sending her voice notes what I’m effectively doing is gathering my thoughts and putting it into a neat package and letting someone else interpret it. It’s oddly cathartic.

That’s the thing about thoughts. They’re often multi-directional, random, obtrusive and sometimes chaotic. Yet we need thoughts to process the different stimuli of the day. We need time to gather-wool as it were. I once asked my granddad what he does all day. He was 80 years old at the time and had made a retirement career of sitting in a chair the whole day, doing nothing. Or so I thought. He replied by saying :

“I’m thinking.”

“about what?”

“80 years of thoughts!”

I’ve made an active effort to have ‘me’ moments in the day. Just to stop for a minute and allow my brain’s fast speed train of thoughts to pull into a station. Organising my mind and my thoughts helps me to organise my whole day, week and efficiently use my time. And I’m finding, as I approach nearer to the end of my education, these moments can transform an otherwise stressful day into a fairly manageable one.

I’m still trying. Sometimes I fail massively and give into all my FOMO¬† (Fear of missing out) thoughts. Recently I started watching this guy on youtube. He’s funny, has an alternative lifestyle to most and is really charming. I had major FOMO just realising his skills and attributes far outweigh my own. FOMO is real people. But I also, in hindsight, should have realised that maybe I am contributing to my own FOMO by allowing such thoughts to fester.

I recently started Vlogging. About medicine. Getting into medicine to be exact. That’s been an interesting experience. The first thing I realised is that I need a new table lamp. The lighting is awful! Second thing I realised is that nothing is easy if you want to do it well and be successful. Think I’m better off trying to be a doctor than a YouTuber. But still I had to give it a go…for my own peace of mind.

I’m starting a new placement tomorrow. Can’t believe in 5 months I’d be done. 7 years man. It’s no joke.